Day 86 " I Passed The Test Today"

Today I had to pick my nephew up from school and get him home.  Until my sister has a car and is able to drive I'm going to be responsible for him.  Today was the first day of school and I wondered how my mood would hold.  I tend to get very stressed, upset, and sometimes angry when my family makes changes to my schedule.  They think because I'm not working that I'm available.  They don't get that part of me controlling my Bipolar is following the same schedule  everyday.  The part that usually makes me angry is that they don't ask me they just assume and get confrontational with me when I call them out of it.  I've explained to them a million times that I need to follow a schedule and that before they commit me to anything they need to ask.  Asking me would make me feel like they had respect for me.

Anyway, I cut both my sister and Mom some slack about picking my nephew up from school.  Neither one of them is able to drive and they have so much on their minds that I can't really be mad at them at this point.  It's only been two and a half weeks since their car accident and my Mom can hardly move and is using a walker.  My sister has bruising all over the one side of her body and it's the ugliest black, blue, and purple I've ever seen.  Every time I see one of my Mom's or sister's bruises I have to leave the room and I cry.  I know that I almost lost a portion of my family on August the 3rd and I'm just so grateful there here. 

So today wasn't a horrible day at all.  I didn't take my Seroquel last night to see how my vision was today and it was normal just like I thought it would be.  However, it did take me a while to fall asleep without it.  I had no depression without taking it but I'm wondering How I'll be if she takes me completely off of it.  I'm going to see the nurse tomorrow and see about just lowering the dosage back down to 300mg instead of the 600mg.  I'm also going to ask if there may be a drug that has less side effects that I could take instead.