In the afternoon, my cousin wanted to go for a walk and I was cool with that. I felt empowered to actually get out of the house and so something. On the other hand I was angry and very irritable this afternoon. I saw the stuff on television about that Zimmerman guy that shot the black kid and it just pissed me off. It wasn’t about if he was guilty or innocent it was just the way the media puts their spin on everything.
I ended up having an outburst saying a bunch of nasty things about some people. I felt manic but at the same time I felt depressed and very slow. My speech was a little slurred. I felt like I couldn’t even concentrate. I also felt like I had some short term memory loss today as well as before. I go to say or do something and I completely forget for few minutes what it was I was looking for or going to say.
After all this my cousin and I walked for 45 minutes which felt good. After we got back, I took a nap for about two hours then drove over to my cousin's house. I hadn’t been to her house in about two weeks and I wanted to see one of her cats I'm really close with. This little cat treats me different than she does other people and is very affectionate. It felt so good to see her and pet her. As I was lying on the bed she walked all over me and kept giving me rubs and purring. She purred a lot and made me feel so good. I can honestly say that I had a really nice time. I felt like I was on top of the world and I felt like I had purpose. When I got home I watered all my Mom’s flowers. Now, I’m sitting here typing this crying. I’ll call them happy tears!
