Day 123 "More Hypomania Today"

Last night I only slept about an hour and a half.  I just couldn't stop the racing thoughts about everything and the hypersexual feelings I was having.  I spent a lot of time on the computer looking at pornography and couldn't stop even though I new it wasn't what I really wanted to be doing.  I would have much rather been in bed getting a good night sleep.

Today I have been thinking about sex all day as well as all kinds of other things.  My brain is in fast forward mode.  Bipolar coerced me on it's roller coaster of ups and downs and I can't get off.  I've also been very irritable today.  When I have times like this I easily explode on people I love and look to pick fights whenever possible.  I kept myself isolated today so that my bipolar wouldn't get in the way of anybody else.

At the beginning of this week I had a Lithium level done and got the test results back.  The results showed that I'm at the low end of a therapeutic dose.  My therapist saw the results and suggested that a higher dose of Lithium may help my hypomania.  I'm going to call my nurse practitioner's nurse tomorrow and see if she can talk to my nurse practitioner about raising my Lithium dose.  I would talk to my nurse practitioner myself but my appointment isn't for three weeks.  I just know that I need some relief.  I'm on week number two of Abilify and I haven't had any side effects since the first week and my depression is going away.  So far this drug is working well with the Lithium and with a little bit more Lithium I might be closer to getting stable.