I would like to wish anyone that may read this blog a Merry Christmas.
I'm always down this time of year because I don't have a lot of money to spend on presents and I also don't have a significant other. I tell myself every year that I'm not going to get in that negative type of mind set. However, year after year I do the same thing and have the same kinds of thoughts. The closer Christmas gets the angrier I get, the more anxiety I feel the more inappropriate my behavior becomes. I have said a lot of off color things this holiday season and it's upsetting because everyone thinks I'm funny when I'm actually crying on the inside which makes my rage even more intense.
I went to church last night with my cousin and after listening to the sermon it hit me that I'm focusing on the wrong things at Christmas. Christmas is about the birth of Jesus not about if a person has a girlfriend or boyfriend. It also doesn't matter how much money you have to buy presents with. With that said my goal for 2015 is to learn more about the Bible and lead a more religious life. While I still have plenty of manic feelings going to church and looking at Christmas a little differently helped me out.
I’m a 46 year old man who’s been dealing with Bipolar my entire life. It wasn’t until 2013 that I was diagnosed and this blog is my story. As you’ll see there’s been many lapses in my posting but I’m going to try and get back with it. I’ve had a lot of trouble during my lapses but I continue to remain optimistic about my bipolar hence the title Optimistic Bipolar.
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